City Manager's Theme Song and Jokes


They’ll Stone Ya




Well, they’ll stone ya when you’re trying to be so good


They’ll stone ya just a-like they said they would


They’ll stone ya when you’re tryin’ to go home


Then they’ll stone ya when you’re there all alone


But I would not feel so all alone


Everybody must get stoned






Well, they’ll stone ya when you’re walkin’ ’long the street


They’ll stone ya when you’re tryin’ to keep your seat


They’ll stone ya when you’re walkin’ on the floor


They’ll stone ya when you’re walkin’ to the door


But I would not feel so all alone


Everybody must get stoned



I am a recovering City Manager. I did not like to get stoned so I spent a lot more time being a City Planner or Economic Development Director or Consultant. That way I got to work for a usually rational City Manager.

Over the years I developed a few jokes to help my city manager friends through a tough day.

City Management - an oxymoron

City Management - a contradiction in terms

City Management - Falling off the cliff everyday

Of course it is your fault - you are the City Manager

City Management - an unnatural act


City Management?


City Management? Really?


City Management? Your kidding, right?

City Management is like assisting at the birth of an elephant. It is a big job, it is messy, and you can definitely get hurt.

Would you want your city to be managed by a person who had such poor judgement that he would move his home and go to work for locally elected officials who can fire him at any time for any reason?

City Management is like riding a fast rolling greasy ball, with the Manager running fast trying to keep from falling off the ball.

City Managers and Planners are always telling you how good thing will be in the distant future.


City Managers are like band aids - the City Council uses them to bind wounds and then discards them.


City Management - A Can of Worms


You are the new City Manager ?  Rent




Why Plan, When You Can React?




I always enjoyed my city manager jokes more when I was not the manager.






Hoary Aphorisms Appropriate For Local Government